Food for Maggots
I am not okay, I don't think I am going to be okay, I am just not happy. Smiling feels like a lie, laughing just makes the tears come out in a more acceptable format. I hate my life, I hate the world. I am tired. The boredom is driving me insane, I don't think I fit in anywhere, and I don't feel like I belong anywhere, there are times when I just can't function or try to pretend that everything around me is okay. All these insane people trying to label everyone else crazy or insane, it makes me sick. The sheer insanity of boredom, loneliness, isolation and sin is enough to weigh heavily down upon anyone that isn't strong enough to bare it. I can bare it, but it's a burden that i did not ask for and a gift i can't use. Being aware of everything around you is like being trapped in groundhog's day but each day gets a little bit more demented than the day before. Things that should make you happy, or make you okay only serve as constant reminders of your ina...